It was disturbing to find these miniature gnomes trapped in a glass snow globe. Gnomes should not be confused with elves, as we do not assist Santa at the holidays, and have much more fashionable hats.
Be afraid
Be afraid, be very afraid …
Gnomeconomics 101
I’ve accepted a post teaching Gnomeconomics at a local University. I’m learning so much from the students. The facilities, however, could be more suited to small-folk like myself. I understand “vertically-challenged” isn’t completely recognized by the state, but it is a liability for me hopping from desk to desk and standing on the overhead projector.
Hitchhikers
You come across the nicest folk on the roads here. Perciful, or Percy as he liked to be called, was great company on my journey through Tuam. However, his bullfrog friend croaked and croaked … my ears are still ringing.
Snail’s pace
You may not think we gnomes need to put up with a lot of job pressure. You need to have patience in order to survive within a garden environment.
iGnome
I just love my gnome sized iPod. I don’t know what I would do without it! Everybody sing! I want to tell you a storyAbout a little manIf I can.A gnome named Grimble Grumble.And little gnomes stay in their homes.Eating, sleeping, drinking their wine.He wore a scarlet tunic,A blue green hood,It looked quite good.He had… Continue reading iGnome
World Cup Fever
I couldn’t help but to watch the England vs. Portugal match on the telly. England lost on penalty kicks … oh well, it’s not the Super Bowl.
Headed home
I have escaped my evil kidnappers and am returning home to find my master. Together we can live in peace and harmony amongst the green hills of Ireland. Now I just need to get that first class upgrade for a better choice of movies. Erin Go Bragh!
SPANK!
This is what happens when Gnomes are bad in their own society. Imagine the pure pain your little friend must be feeling from someone outside the Gnome world. I wear iron gloves. I spanked him so hard last night that he dropped his marker. He won’t be able to sit for a week. Hee Hee… Continue reading SPANK!
Strawberry-tastrophe
Seems your little friend has a penchant for the shiny red fruits. We took him to the orchard yesterday, hoping that the fresh air would cure him of the cough he picked up in that questionable restroom facility. However, he would not stop eating the strawberries. After a while, we found him passed out in… Continue reading Strawberry-tastrophe